Go see "Clerks 2"!

Let me say from the top that I'm a huge Kevin Smith fan. I actually saw the first Clerks in a theater during its initial run. The fact that I was a video store clerk at the time (1994) made it a must-see; I certainly identified with Dante and Randal. So I've followed Smith on his cinematic journey. Want my ten-second reviews of his oevre?

Clerks. A masterpiece. In the 1990's, between Tarantino and Smith, there was/is no movie dialogue equal.

Mallrats. I think Jason Lee is great, but the rest of the script, acting, etc. is merely ok. Still, I think the criticism of the movie is overdone.

Chasing Amy. One of Smith's best, and I actually like Ben Affleck as an actor here -- a minor miracle in itself. Yet I have issues with the main story point: the beautiful lesbian that "becomes" heterosexual when Affleck reveals his love. This seems more a convenient plot device /fantasy than reality.

Dogma. Great on many levels -- it's a smart movie, guaranteed to get you talking. Sometimes, however, the movie itself is too talky; a common weakness and strength of Smith's first movies is dialogue that is so long and literary that line readings can be difficult, even with talented actors like Chris Rock. (From JASBSB on, he's finally found a balance in this area.) And Linda Fiorentino seems uncomfortable in the View Askewinverse. (Reportedly, she bickered on-set with Smith. It shows.)

Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. Funny, funny, funny. After Clerks, JASBSB is my second-favorite Smith DVD to pop in and watch. Wil Ferrell's character is particularly good. But the movie is an elaborate in-joke; hard to imagine people not familiar with Smith's previous flicks would enjoy it.

Jersey Girl. Since I was becoming a father when this movie came out, I appreciated some of the dad-daughter moments Smith was putting on the screen -- heck, I got teary-eyed a few times. But that's where my praise ends. It's schmaltzy, and even without the J.Lo/Affleck post-breakup fallout that doomed this movie when it opened, it's hard to see how it could have succeeded. My least favorite Smith film.

When I heard about Clerks 2, I was worried. I figured Smith had finally sold out and was shooting a quick sequel for the cash. But, I wanted to give him a chance, and I'm glad. Clerks 2 delivers: it's heartfelt without schmaltz, and most importantly, hilarious. One of the smart things Smith does is let his characters age. I didn't realize, until Dante and Randal mention it in the movie, is that they're my age: 32. In the first Clerks, they were blissfully breezing through life in jobs that were just enough to pay the bills. In the sequel, they face impending fatherhood, marriage, the prospect of "real" jobs, and friends moving away. I was startled to think how the Clerks movies completely parallel my life. The fact that Smith has melded the warmth of Jersey Girl, the dialogue of Clerks and the fun of Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back is an achievement. Go see it.

By the way, shame on Joel Siegel, who noisily walked out of a New York screening of Clerks 2 just 40 minutes into the movie. (Interesting that he complained he was leaving because the movie was too vulgar, while using the F word in his out-loud complaint.) Mr. Siegel, you get paid to watch movies. And apparently, to write atrocious puns in your reviews. Not a bad gig, pal. You have every right to tear the movie apart in your review. Or even leave if you must, if you do it quietly, respecting your fellow audience members / peer reviewers. But really: for all the terrible movies you've sat through and somehow positively reviewed, can Clerks 2 have been that bad? As for the way you left the screening, let's put it in perspective. If a teenager had done what you had done in my local theater, he'd be booed at and considered immature. For a so-called professional, you acted like a child.